So many Women Empowerment groups been formed……
Everyone wants to fix Women, Empower Women, Making women WISER, Reforming Women, Connect Women Uplift Women???
Do Women, Need Reforming? Do women need Fixing? Do women need Uplifting? And here is the Irony…. Most of the above initiatives are started by Women….
Organizations eagerly sponsor women’s events , programs and initiatives. However, is the corporate organisations and women development forums getting their return on investment from these initiatives, programs and events.
Although there seem to be some benefits from all the women development initiatives in the past decade or so, but the rise of women leadership and women in boardrooms have remain far and large stagnant. In our opinion, one of the reasons for the stagnation is that such initiatives can actually perpetuate stereotypical ways of thinking about women, even among women who are in most cases the drivers of these initiatives.
Training Excellence, as an International woman-owned firm, have often been requested to work with women, provide women’s workshops and Training. I personally have been invited to speak at women’s networks and conferences. As enjoyable as these events are, I personally started growing uncomfortable with a subtle suggestion that permeated many of these gatherings…. The idea that women have similar deficits that hold them back from advancing in senior ranks.
It is undisputable that man and women have very different experience in the workplace due to a variety of factors, and furthermore, just like the men counterparts, not every woman has the same experiences and challenges in the workplace. Therefore, the notion of “one size fits all” women development initiatives is outrageous. What needs to change or be fixed is the whole approach to women development initiatives.
As gender balance in workplaces is beginning to gain momentum, we must work with organizations to remove barriers for women’s advancement. We must equally work within ourselves as women leaders to become aware of and remove the glass ceilings and Sticky Floors syndromes in our own heads first – habits and mindsets that lead to self-sabotage, and make it exhausting for so many of us to move our careers forward. Each Women have their own Beliefs and Self-Sabotages which either determines their limits (Glass Celling) or Stuck states (Sticky floor) Syndromes.
As individuals we have between 22 to 42 Constructs to drive us into action, ranging from Personal Development to Risk Taking to Freedom of Lifestyle and Authority etc…
Each person is Unique with drivers where the same drivers are Primary for some and secondary for others. Knowing this, we realise that in a defined space we adapt according to what drives us to perform. Which mean that NO two women are the same, and cannot be put together in one network to be either fixed or Reformed. Each must have its own Action plan to be effective.
Three important common areas that’s holding Women back
- Collaboration VS. Competition
Many Women don’t know that Collaboration is the New Competition.
Women most likely to collaborate will be high in risk taking, high in authority, high in teamwork, high in result-orientation and possibly high in creativity and variety.
Women most likely to compete instead will be low in these areas but high in autonomy and high in status. As there is no right or wrong based on ones Driving Dynamics, competing will not get one into Senior positions, Collaborating with our male counterparts and other Women would be the better option. As problems are becoming more and more interconnected and complex , leaders and organizations are recognising these modern-day challenges and thus are putting aside their self-interests and are rather collaborating to advance their shared and collective objectives.
2. Building Networks Rather than Leveraging off Networks
Women are too busy joining networking women groups. We should be investing our time in Gender Co-existent networks and leveraging off both male and female networks. Women generally are high on Relationship Reliance; The key here is that they are sometimes more RELIANT on relationships instead of LEVERAGING off the relationships. There is a huge difference. One is dependant and the other is independent. Leveraging off a relationship is more beneficial to each party as they each gain a win-win situation from the relationship. After a network and meetup, spend time on how one can leverage off that meeting and then act immediately on it. Just knowing a prominent leader and taking some pictures with them is not going to make the business work. As women we should use our strength of Building Personal Relationships to convert that into Transactional Relationships.
3. Wanting to be Liked as opposed to be Respected
There are some very interesting data to review on how women view their own presence. This is not about how women compare themselves with men, but rather, how women rate themselves compared to how men rate themselves. Men generally rate themselves very high on Authenticity as opposed to Women. Women are less direct and put others needs before their own as they mostly want to be liked and therefore, they not as Authentic as men rates themselves. One of the elements of Gravitas in Executive presence in Women is Grace under Fire termed as “Showing teeth”. Making difficult decisions is what we look to leaders to do. It is not so much about rendering the right decision, but about rendering a decision at a time when no one else dares, that confers gravitas, because it telegraphs that you have the courage, as well as the confidence, to impose a direction and take responsibility for it and NOT been liked.
Another component of Executive Presence for both men and women, is been Decisive. Given that stereotypically male attributes-like aggression, assertiveness, toughness, dominance is a norm, we accept that it’s supposedly easier for males to appear decisive. Women, however, find it more difficult in being decisive. It’s a catch twenty two for Women: If you’re tough, you’re a #$^&^% and no one wants to work for you or with you, but if you’re not tough, you’re not perceived as leadership material and you won’t be given anyone to work for you. It’s a tough- act that every capable woman has had to perform under, and the higher she goes, the more dangerous and difficult. Up for the challenge anyone?
Not just as women leaders, BUT rather as LEADERS holistically, we should harness all our strengths and Lead with a mindset that is truly from within us. Having had the opportunity to look at the data and coach women based on Executive Presence and Reality Check AssessmentsTM , it’s helped us appreciate that the only effective way to help them advance is to treat women as individuals. Frankly we think that it’s time for an overhaul of women’s leadership development. If the one-size-fits-all thinking doesn’t change, the interventions won’t change, and there will be disappointments all round.
Peter Drucker says, “You cannot manage what you have not measured”. For a consult on your Driving Dynamics Constructs and determining how your limiting beliefs and sticky floor holds you back from achieving and rising to Executive Presence, Training Excellence can assist you in solving these critical factors contact Hawa Charfaray, CEO: Training Excellence South Africa and CEO Orbrix in (UAE) hawa@trainexcellence.co.za or hawa@orbrix.net
Contact No: +27 11 568 5057/ +27 82 459 2309/+971 50 177 5109
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More about Hawa Charfaray:
Hawa Charfaray is the CEO & Founder of Training Excellence Africa & The Middle East and CEO Orbrix Dubai. She is a renowned International Corporate Trainer, Motivational Global Speaker and Business Executive Coach.
Hawa has invested in changing lives through her many years of experience as a corporate wellness practitioner, an NLP practitioner, Life Coach, Language and Behavior (LAB) Profile Practitioner, Inventory, Work Attitude and Motivation (iWAM) practitioner, Ecometric practitioner, Hypnotherapy Practitioner and Timeline Practitioner. She is both honored and inspired to be nominated by the recognized bodies In her profile. She says “We cannot become ourselves by ourselves. We need to go out of our way to support each other. We need to be mirrored, emulated and celebrated, as who you are truly does make a difference – Become Consciously Purposeful in Your Life as a leader!”
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